Helping Men Face The Challenges of Mid Life with Confidence and Fulfilment. 

I was born into a 1950’s loving family and fortunately had an idyllic childhood living on the West Cornish coast.

At the age of 18 years old I secured a job with a high street bank as a grade 1 clerk. I made some good friends there. As time went by however the bank moved me away from home to north Cornwall and so I was only able to get home on weekends.

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Becoming more senior within the bank I began to feel under pressure and despite getting married to one of the girls in the bank I felt the bank was stifling my individuality and trying to clone me into a grey ‘bank man type’ of which I despise. As jobs were difficult to come by, I stuck it out and after several moves around Devon and Cornwall in various branches I settled into a routine. All the time feeling trapped in a roll that I had no interest or ambition in.

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In the mid-eighties however, I left the bank and decided I could make something of myself doing something that I had an interest in namely health food and exercise. With a wife and now three children I was determined to make a success of myself. At the businesses peak I was running three shops and the first non-smoking café in the southwest of England. Life was good, at least for a few years but, the in late eighties  costs were escalating and interest rates were climbing and the business crashed in 1990. Not just the shops, my marriage failed as well and I found myself living in a room in a small cottage, sharing with a crazy Irishman, a very low point of my life having lost my family, house, business, self esteem and confidence. Eventually forced by my perilous financial situation I retuned home to mum and dad, who by this time were not enjoying good health.

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I lurched from short term work to periods of unemployment and to cap it all in early 1992 my dad died suddenly. Now left with a sick mother to care for I was well and truly in a dark place. Although I loved my mum, I found the situation strained our relationship. Then came a breakthrough, I got a sales job with a local timber firm and began making a success in my role. I was soon climbing the ladder and attained the role of sales manager. I made new friends and my social life began to grow.

The success I was enjoying gave me financial stability and I could afford the trappings of my new wealth, this manifested itself in late nights drinking and smoking far too much. Consequently, I began to make drinking an unhealthy habit which I realised I was beginning to rely on. Coupled this with an unhealthy diet It was at this point I was diagnosed with pre type 2 diabetes, a real shock. At almost 17 stones (240 pounds) at 5 feet nine inches I was far too heavy and had trouble walking home up the hill.  My days of ‘heath food and exercise’ were a long way behind me.

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By some miracle I met a lady who was to become my second wife. She wasn’t much of a drinker and although smoking still persisted I began to turn my diet around and eventually after several years of a healthier lifestyle the meds I was on for my type 2 diabetes were stopped. There was a sting in the tail however of this good news. Family relationships became strained.